EMBRACING COMFORT

By Dr. Debra Collins
www.thewritedebracollins.com

​What keeps a young child smiling and secure 24-7? Their loving parents? Doting grandparents?
 
How about their comfort toy or blankie!
 
“Transitional Object” is the technical term for these prized possessions. In all the big, wide world, this particular item serves as “a constant companion, a silent confidant, and a source of unwavering support.” The child is “holding onto a piece of home, a reminder of the love and safety they feel with their parents.” In other words, “It’s like having a best friend who’s always there … It’s like carrying a little bubble of comfort wherever they go.” The comfort object is a tool for learning stress-management and self-soothing. The sense of security if provides lays the foundation for building independence. (Source: NeuroLaunch; neurolaunch.com/transitional-object-psychology).
 
Writers Charles Schulz and Mo Willems understood that the loss of that precious object is A BIG DEAL. Linus loses his blanket - AAUGH! Trixie’s dad loses her Knuffle Bunny - WAAAA!
 
As a young mother, to ward off such catastrophe, I had a friend crochet several small blankies out of the same yarn. Same color, same texture. I kept several at home and in the car. I had enough to safely switch them out and wash them before my child became fond of some funky smell. Thankfully, my baby did become attached to the blankie, or my strategic planning would have come to naught.
 
Which brings us to this month’s book. In THE IMPOSTER, Olive struggles to cope with the loss of her “Cuddly…Reliable…Perfect” Mr. Snuggles, her playmate, confidante, and comfort.
 

​The crisis puts Olive through several phases of emotion and activity. First, the meltdown. Next, a fruitless search. Then, a valiant but futile effort to build a new Mr. Snuggles out of various odds and ends. Another round of sobbing…
 
Suddenly, Mr. Snuggles reappears! Olive is delighted, until she notices that he’s a little too clean and fluffy.
 
At this point, I, as reader, suspected Mr. Snuggles had finally been put through the washer and drier. But no! Olive must cope with something even more dire: her parents bought a brand-new Mr. Snuggles! And they thought she wouldn’t notice. “IMPOSTER!” Olive wails. And when she finds the box it came in, her parents come clean.
 
Having experienced desperation, determination, delight, and disappointment, Olive now is filled with resentment. The Imposter is an annoying playmate, an inadequate confidante. BUT –
 
An excellent comfort during that night’s thunderstorm. Olive embraces the new toy: literally, and, the next morning, emotionally. Of course, this is when her dog drags in the raggedly, missing Mr. Snuggles.
 
Olive resumes her relationship with Mr. Snuggles but finds she doesn't feel right abandoning The Imposter. Now she is ready to give comfort, as well as receive it. Her heart has grown, and Olive creates new, inclusive bonds. Embracing BOTH plushies, Olive introduces Mr. Snuggles and Mr. Huggles to each other, promising, “We’ll have lots to do … together.”